


Something like fluff

by HoundstoothStiletto



Category: Mass Effect - All Media Types, Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Dissociation, F/M, Fluff, Fluffuary 2021, Friendship, Renegade Shepard (Mass Effect), Romance, implicit sexual content
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-01
Updated: 2021-02-09
Packaged: 2021-03-12 09:55:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 7,244
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29133669
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HoundstoothStiletto/pseuds/HoundstoothStiletto
Summary: Janey Shepard doesn't know how to show Garrus she cares, but she's confident that this problem, like all problems, can be fixed by shooting it in the head.Fluffuary oneshots of my renegade Shepard and Garrus Vakarian.
Relationships: Female Shepard/Garrus Vakarian
Kudos: 34





	1. Peers

**Author's Note:**

> Fluffuary Day 1 - Flirting
> 
> [Prompts from Tumblr ](https://ir0n-angel.tumblr.com/post/639126489699319808/bringing-the-list-back-for-a-second-year-but)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fluffuary Day 1 - flirting 
> 
> [Prompts from Tumblr ](https://ir0n-angel.tumblr.com/post/639126489699319808/bringing-the-list-back-for-a-second-year-but)

ME2

"Vakarian, can I seduce you?"

Garrus turned to see Shepard wearing very little and looking very frustrated. 

"Uh, maybe? Why?" He closed the main battery doors. Whatever was going to happen, he didn't want Kelly Chambers to watch. 

"Great, I need to practice so Samara can kill her daughter."

"I… didn't know Samara had a daughter," he said truthfully and also cautiously.

"Okay, here's the plan," she said. She didn't add, "of a violent and ruthless attack." She didn't need to. Her face said so. All the time.

"I'm wearing this sexy dress," Shepard gestured to her mostly unclothed body.

Garrus nodded. He had seen it before, and didn't ask if that was the entire dress. He was pretty sure it wasn't. But whatever it was, it was sexy. Especially when she turned around. As a turian he had to admire such a strong muscle. 

"To get Samara's serial killer daughter to be distracted by sexy me." 

Garrus nodded again. He was following so far.

"And then when she's distracted by my sexy, Samara will swoop in and BAM!" Shepard picked up one of his guns from his workstation and pretended to shoot. 

Garrus carefully watched her put the pistol back. A little calmer that it was back in place. 

"Sorry," she said quietly, noticing his discomfort. She didn't like it when people touched her guns either. 

An apology from Shepard. That was the most unexpected thing she said so far. His instincts told him that accepting the apology would push her away. She was surprisingly skittish. 

"Ah, so you need to figure out how to be sexy," Garrus teased, offering a hand to help her back to her more comfortable place, where she could slide into a hard and defensive shell. It mostly worked. Shepard scowled, but still looked uncertain. Like her shell didn’t quite fit anymore. 

"Yeah, of course you can practice on me," he said genially and gently, not wanting to see what might happen if she was made even a little bit more vulnerable. He would have said yes anyway. 

"Great," she smiled and walked right up to him. Pressing her body against his, a leg slid up and draped itself over his hip. Tightening. She touched his face to make him look at her. 

"Let's fuck."

Garrus knew that she likely exposed her most, if not all, of her thigh. If he looked down, how much would she see? Was the ‘dress’ all she wore? 

She stepped back and looked up at him, with genuine curiosity. "Well. How'd I do?"

"That's certainly one way," he cleared his throat. "But. But, uh. What do you know about this daughter?"

"These are the directions Samara gave me," she said as her omnitool lit up. Garrus tried not to think about his parents ever giving someone directions for how to seduce him. Instead maybe he should think about taking Shepard’s arm to hold the directions at an angle he could see. And how odd it was for Shepard to be so open. Letting him touch her omnitool, asking for his help, talking to him like a peer. 

She wasn’t like that on the SR1. Her absolute certainty about herself was gone. 

Maybe don’t think about that. 

"Okay, so Samara wants her to approach you," he read, "so maybe _don't_ do that. More flirty and less seductive... but damn if that wouldn't work."

Shepard smiled at the compliment before asking, "What's the difference?" 

"I have no idea. Let's try this," he said and she nodded, a serious frown. She was paying attention. 

He cleared his throat, and swaggered into a new position. 

"I'm Morinth. Morinth?" 

At Shepard’s nod, he continued. 

"...I'm a sexy Asari, and…" he gestured for Shepard to show him her notes again. Ok. He got it. "And I think you are an impressive human."

Smooth. 

Shepard maintained an eye contact that froze him and slowly walked up to him. "That I am, " she said, pinning him with her gaze, her voice low and sultry and sweet. "What specifically impresses you, Morinth?" 

"You're dangerous," he said, remembering the notes, hoping it was relevant and not what he was thinking. Not _just_ what he was thinking. 

Shepard smiled and shrugged. "True."

Then suddenly her voice got lighter, and she paused and stepped back again. "Is this better? Flirtier?"

"Yeah, um. Yes. Look. Flirting is about…" Garrus realized he had no idea. But what he was making up felt right. "It's about you. You show enough of you to make them appreciate and know what you have. Potentially. but not enough to… Not enough to satisfy."

"Okay, I get it," Shepard said happily. “Make them know something could be available, but they need to ask for it."

Sure. That sounds right.

Then Shepard was back on him, literally on him, and sultry again. "There are a lot of ways to be dangerous…" she said with a smirk and she rolled her hips into him. 

Garrus didn't say anything. Couldn't. His hand came down to steady her before this went further. 

"You can't just grab a lady's ass," she said laughing and pulled back. 

"I - what am I supposed to touch? You were pushing me off balance and it's the most convenient part of you to grab. Right at arm's length, just the right shape to, you know…" he made a grabby gesture. 

Shepard laughed again. He was making Shepard laugh.

"Well, I might have been getting more seductive than flirty anyway,” she continued. “This is good, I think I got it now."

"Let me know how it goes," Garrus turned to go back to work, thinking she would be gone by now. But she was still there, and then she kissed him. His good mandible. 

“Thanks,” she said. And then she was gone. 

_Make them know something could be available, but they need to ask for it._

* * *

"We can test your reach and my flexibility," she smirked. And they both paused, both realizing she walked right into his setup. Shepard instantly smothered the surprise of being caught. 

_Now what are you going to do_ , her face said. 

He didn't expect for it to work, or plan on it. But, he could keep on playing this game. "Why the hell not?" 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and I hope you enjoyed ❤


	2. Just add water

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fluffuary Day 2 - acts of devotion
> 
> [Prompts from Tumblr ](https://ir0n-angel.tumblr.com/post/639126489699319808/bringing-the-list-back-for-a-second-year-but)

ME3

Garrus did so much for her. He supported her when she was talking about the end of the world. When she appeared out of nowhere after years to go on a suicide mission. When she doubted. When she won. When she lost. When he sat her down on his console with her legs open just to watch her get wet as he talked.

She needed to do something for him. Something to say I love you, with as much strength as his devotion did. 

She could say it. She did. But he knew how hollow her voice was, how easily she lied, how she used words like disposable weapons. 

He saw her, so many times, promise not to hurt someone before shooting them dead, promising an ally loyalty while shamelessly betraying them. 

So it made sense, when she had tried to tell him how much he meant to her, he wasn't sure how much she was making fun of him. But, it hurt so much. 

When he took her up on the presidium, she had never been more honest. She loved him, she told him, until he believed. But her honesty was weak, like an unused muscle.

And it wasn't one she necessarily wanted to strengthen. 

So she had to show him. She had to show him in the same way her bed blankets and pillows were just in the right place, how her water glass was always full, how her Thanix cannon was always perfectly calibrated. 

But what could she do? 

Aha. Perfect!

"Stop what you're doing! Don't move Vakarian," she said as authoritatively as she could, which was quite a bit. 

"Alright," Garrus said, a bit amused, waiting for whatever was coming next. 

Vega looked terrified. 

"What is this?" She asked, taking a package from him. "Food? What were you going to do with this?"

"I was going to eat it."

"Any specifics or customizations?" She asked, studying the directions. Looked simple. 

"No, " Garrus said, she looked up at him. A big grin, his sharp teeth flashing. He looked happy. Good. 

"Well then sit," she directed. "I'll make it for you."

Vega interrupted. "Everything okay?"

"Just peachy," Garrus said, relaxing into a chair. 

Shepard watched the hot water seep into the food, slowly growing, a Garrusy scent starting. Not her favorite, but not the point. She stirred it twice and presented it to him. 

"Perfect," he thanked her, casually rubbing the back of her thigh, "I appreciate it."

Shepard glowed on her way to meet with Admiral Xen. There was still a war to win. But she could find time to water his dehydrated food. And she would. Whenever she could.

"I thought she was going to shoot you," Vega said, almost so she couldn't hear it. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and I hope you enjoyed ❤


	3. Step 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fluffuary Day 3 - first kiss
> 
> [Prompts from Tumblr ](https://ir0n-angel.tumblr.com/post/639126489699319808/bringing-the-list-back-for-a-second-year-but)

ME3

"How to kiss a human"

"How to kiss a human turian"

"How Turians kiss humans"

"Turian asari kiss"

"Turian drell kiss"

"Interspecies turian kiss"

"Do all humans kiss"

Garrus sighed. He didn't learn anything new. Between prior research and experience, all possible kissing angles have been covered.

It won't even get that far, he chastised himself. 

It was over. It had been over. He ruined it. He made his move in their game, a bad move, and she hadn't used her turn since. 

He spent more time than he should have telling himself it could have been worse. At least she didn't laugh when he imagined. Imagined more. A place to live, a family, a more than stress relief between two friends who had no shortage of stress. Popping the heatsink in every sense. 

He tried to tell himself that would have been worse than her quietly shutting down such notions and then going stiff in his arms.

He only had that little bit of hope because she said something that might mean it was still his turn. 

The dead don't sleep. They're dead. They don't do anything. Sleep is for the living, and Shepard needed to stay alive. 

He promised to wake her up if needed. "I know where you sleep." 

"Do you?" Shepard snapped. He didn't mean it like that, but all he could think of was that apparently it was still his turn. 

And he wanted it to be the last one. Well, she could have the last move if she wanted (she would want that), but he was done with the game.

Garrus reviewed his four step plan for his last move, and started to write a message. "Next time we're on the Citadel…"

Step 1. Take Shepard somewhere romantic and special - success.

Shepard willingly let him take her wherever he wanted, without even asking until they were almost there. 

Step 2. Ask for their relationship (or tatters of) to be serious, romantic, monogamous, real and not a game and not just stress relief. Because he couldn't take or give anything less - success.

He acknowledged the uncertainty he put in their relationship by testing the line between friendship and romance to the point where the line broke. 

He asked her to be a one Turian kind of woman. 

Step 3. 

Step 3. Really?

Step 3. He wanted step 3 so deeply, he couldn't dig it out to describe it. He wanted.

Step 3. Romance = kissing.

Step 3. She couldn't be this cruel. 

Step 3. 

Step 3. Sexually, Shepard was not much for kissing. Well not on the mouth. There would be a quick press on his mouth plates as they rolled into a position, an occasional open mouth moan right into his own (his favorite) , and sometimes, the most common one, a friendly kiss. On his mandible, near his mouth plates, his temple. 

He had instigated their kisses more than she did. He did the research. (And what's the point of sleeping with a human if you don't suck faces, a lot of research said. He stopped going to those resources, eventually.) And he liked it. He liked kissing. 

And even if he didn't. All the research said, romance = kissing. And, honestly, he wanted both A lot. 

Step 3.

Step 3. Kiss like you mean it. Kiss like you love her in all the ways you know of. Kiss in the way that means this, this is the first kiss of many that all mean I love you so completely and I'm bursting with it and I need to kiss you and you to kiss me. 

Step 3. He knocked her off her feet. 

Step 3. Kiss delivered and received - success.

Step 4. Sniping contest - failure. 

But second best isn't bad, especially if the best is your girlfriend.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and I hope you enjoyed ❤


	4. Lunch date

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fluffuary Day 4 - awkward but cute
> 
> [Prompts from Tumblr ](https://ir0n-angel.tumblr.com/post/639126489699319808/bringing-the-list-back-for-a-second-year-but)

Post ME3

"I want to be supportive," Shepard insisted, "like you are for me. And I want to meet them."

Garrus was sure this was something he shouldn't find so amusing. Hopefully as the war got further away, his entertainment standards would go up. 

"Shepard, honey," he said carefully, "I know and I appreciate it. I want you to meet them too. But. Well. You're still."

Shepard waited for him to continue. What could he say? Sick? Unwell? High and spazzy from pain meds and short circuited cybernetics? 

"You're still recovering, " he finished. 

"Oh, that," she laughed. "I'm fine."

"Of course you are," Garrus soothed her hair down, knowing it would help her fall asleep. And when she did, he would go and meet his father and sister. For the first time in… well in a long time. Practically since before the war really started. 

"Garrus," a familiar voice. His father's voice. How did they?

"Hey," Solana added. 

"How did you get past hospital security?" He asked right as Shepard gave a celebratory whoop. 

"Vakarians!" She greeted. "Let's get lunch."

"I hope you're hungry, Commander," Castis said. 

"Garrus, help me with the cybernetics," she said. 

"Yeah Garrus," Solana added, "Help with the cybernetics."

Garrus sighed and started to reactivate her cybernetics. "Yeah, of course Shepard. Hold on."

"You call your girlfriend by her family name?" Solana asked, bringing Shepard's omnichair closer. 

"No," Shepard said, kicking and twitching as she warned up. "he calls me his little sex varren."

Garrus stopped. He absolutely did not. "Are you sure you want to come, _honey_?" 

"Absolutely. I'm a Spectre and I can do whatever I want."

"Actually," Castis said, "your guard encouraged us to take Commander Shepard out as well."

Damn Vega. 

(Wait.He may have called her that once. _Once._ To be silly.)

* * *

"It's good to finally meet you Commander," Castis said as the small group left Shepard's hospital room.

Shepard grabbed his hand. "You sound like Garrus."

"Yes, my son and I do have similar voices," Castis agreed, gently trying to get his hand back. He tried to catch his son's attention for help. 

Garrus was too busy glaring at James Vega, who happily waved them off. 

"I bet it helps you get. The people. You want to get with," Shepard said thoughtfully. 

"Shepard," Garrus interrupted and moved to help his girlfriend let go of his father. 

"Garrus has such a sexy voice," Shepard continued. "It's one of the main reasons I wanted to sleep with him. At least at first."

Garrus decided no one heard that. 

"Shepard, relax your hand," Garrus calmly said, trying to massage it open, which she didn't seem to hear. Shepard's hand was firm and tight on Castis's. 

"You guys might be holding hands for a while. I guess you can steer her chair?" Garrus said quietly. 

"So, does it?" Shepard continued. "Your voice? Help with…" she waggled her eyebrows. 

"I have been seeing someone," Castis said, "and he is deaf, so it must be something else."

"Dad? You're -" Garrus was interrupted by his sister, pulling him aside. 

"Are you guys married?" Solana hissed.

"No, " Garrus said, confused and a bit offended.

Solana looked skeptical. Great. 

* * *

Garrus was impressed. His father and Shepard were getting along great. They held hands all the way to the cafetería, Castis was better at steering Shepard's chair than anyone else had been (she kicks). And decades of detective work was paying off. He was very good at talking to people who were high. 

And Shepard? At least she stopped telling lies about pet names (mostly lies), and was trying to explain her cybernetics by comparing them to killing a Krogan. "Basically, they're frazzled," she said for at least the third time. "But they don't stop, even after you shoot them between the eyes."

"I think you're taking advantage of a sick woman and her spectre authority," Solana said. Before Garrus could respond. Before he even processed what she said, their food was ready.

Advantage? He wasn't taking advantage. Looking at the woman almost asleep in her applesauce, he wasn't even sure what there was to take advantage of. 

"What are you talking about?" Garrus snapped. 

'How else are you able to get round the clock access, control over her _cybernetics,_ and a guard who waves people in by dropping your name?"

Castis sighed. "I don't think -"

"Unless you're married, " Solana finished. 

Garrus was literally speechless. Mostly from the idea that he would ever take advantage of Shepard. Even if he wasn't in love with her and completely devoted to her, she was a dangerous woman, who did not like being "jerked around." As she called it. 

But, how did he get such access? Was it her spectre authorization? Were they married? At least he could address one thing.

"Vega? He's just - "

Of course! Vega wanted to get them out so he could be alone with that asari who cleans Shepard's room. No, he needed more info before addressing that one.

"This soup is delicious, Commander. How is yours?" Castis conversed with Shepard, whose hand she still held firm. And may have been asleep. 

"I get it because. Because she said so, " Garrus said, breathing fast and trying to calm down. Could anyone get him so pissed off so quickly? 

"Garrus is delicious soup when he -" Shepard mercifully stopped to consider her words. 

"Shepard," Garrus interrupted, having no desire for her to finish that sentence. No matter how curious he was. "Let's start over. I'd like to formally introduce you to my dad Castis and sister Solana."

Shepard let go of Castis's hand and held hers in front of her. "Have my cybernetics been on too long?"

"Not yet," Garrus answered. 

Shepard turned to Solana and explained, "My cybernetics are basically frazzled."

Garrus continued. "Dad, Sol, this is my girlfriend. She goes by Shepard. With _everyone_."

"As I said, Commander, it's good to finally meet you," Castis said politely. 

"It's nice to meet you too," Shepard replied. "Garrus is my everything. You don't need to worry about him. I won't let anyone beat 'im up. He's durable. He keeps you… you should be proud."

"I am," Castis answered.

He is?

Shepard turned to Solana, "We actually already met. On Arcturus Station. I don't like your hat."

"I'm not wearing a - " Solana reached for her fringe. 

"Yes you are," Garrus muttered. 

Solana pulled off a ruffled cap and answered, "I don't like it either, but I was cold. Easy to forget about."

"You guys met?" Garrus asked.

"No, your girlfriend is high. I've never been to Arcturus Station, " Solana answered. 

"Mmmhmm," Shepard agreed.

* * *

Shepard was fast asleep when they returned to her hospital room. As expected, James Vega was not at the door. 

"Sorry," Solana murmured as she hugged Garrus, "I just. Everything."

"I know," Garrus hugged her back, a little tighter. "I miss you."

Garrus banged the door to Shepard's room open, to surprised squeals within. To give the occupant time to vacate, Garrus turned to his father. 

"Dad," he reached out, "I'm happy you're doing okay. And thanks for…"he gestured to Shepard.

"It's fine. She has a firm grip." The men embraced, as Vega and that Asari left Shepard's room. 

"Hey," Vega greeted, "Shepard's room is good as new."

"Thanks," Garrus said dryly, thinking he probably needed to learn that Asari's name. 

Garrus suddenly realized something as he pushed Shepard back to bed. "You guys can come in, if you want. We can catch up."

"What?" James asked. "I'm not sure about that."

"That sounds great," Solana said, ignoring James Vega. "So, Garrus. How have you been? Did you know Dad's dating a human too?"


	5. The Tali Thing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fluffuary Day 5 - banter
> 
> This one was hard to write, but I managed to fit some fluff in.

ME3

"And then, we'll banter for a while," Shepard continued, explaining her elaborate 'first date' scenario.

Garrus didn't point out the problems with it - starting with the basis. If they were strangers, he wouldn't be interested in her. But, they weren't, he was, and she was adorable.

"Banter? How do we banter?" he asked.

Shepard stopped. Her enthusiasm for pretending to have a one night stand with him evaporated. 

Crap.

"Oh, I don't know," she said lightly, "it's like how you do with Tali. All the time."

Oh. That. He _just_ had that conversation. It was a mess and he hoped it would never come up again. Ever. 

"So, the Tali thing," he started. Shepard could still surprise him. It was not something he expected her to care about. "I didn't know it was. A thing. And it's not."

Good job, Vakarian. 

Shepard waited for him to continue. Or had nothing to say. 

"There won't be anymore, uh, 'banter.' It was an accident," he continued. 

"An accident?" She sounded skeptical. He could tell she put in a lot of effort not to snap or scoff or deliver some low blow. 

It felt like years since he needed to be cautious around her feelings. He thought they were completely in sync. Apparently, just mostly. 

He had already been defensive enough for the Tali thing. He should just stick to the facts, since explaining this seemed to make everything worse.

She'd understand. 

"Look. I'll just tell you how I found out about it."

* * *

Garrus wanted to look at the Kodiak, but James Vega was adamant. 

"Scars," James said seriously, "let's go."

"Next time," Steve said, letting him know that today wasn't going to be the day he got to play with the Kodiak gun. Oh well. 

James Vega's nest was busy and cluttered and smelled like sweat.

"How can I help you, Jimmy?" Garrus was annoyed. The Kodiak...

"Look," James said carefully, "I know it's not my business -"

"Then stay out of it," Garrus was now more annoyed. The cannons...

"But you gotta end things with Tali. It's not right. And I can say this is for the war. Shepard. Well. Shepard gets a lot from you. I know that's a lot of pressure but -"

"Wait," Garrus interrupted. "What things with Tali?"

"You know," Vega was now very uncomfortable. "The way you…"

Garrus wished he didn't see the picture Vega was showing him. Garrus wished it didn't make him so angry. 

"Flirt?" Garrus suggested harshly. Vega nodded. 

Garrus sighed. He just wanted to look at a big gun. 

"I'm not. There's no Tali thing. I'm not flirting with Tali," Garrus started. But he could see why someone might think so, if they weren't paying attention. He should explain. "It's just. There's a war."

"Tell me about it," James snorted.

"And sometimes. I guess. It's nice to. Just. Forget about it?" Garrus said.

"By flirting with Tali?"

"No. Well maybe. Not really. It doesn't mean anything. Just tease my friends." Garrus felt weak. Because he was explaining something that wasn't happening. With a bit of sudden strength, he continued. "By those standards, I flirt with you more than I flirt with Tali."

Take that, Vega. 

"Yeah, but no one thinks you're interested in me. Everyone sees what's going on with Tali."

What? No one? Everyone?

"Don't worry about my relationship, James. Or my loyalty to Shepard."

He should go and talk to Tali. Make sure she knew about this nonsense. 

Garrus gave a forlorn look at the Kodiak. Next time. 

"Do you have a few minutes to meet in Jack's room?" He asked over comms.

"It's not Jack's room anymore," she said, which probably meant she had time. Tali didn't answer otherwise.

"It still smells like her," Garrus was having yet another ridiculous conversation, but at least this one was based in reality. 

"It what?"

"You know. Like paint. Actually maybe you don't know, with all your suit stuff, protecting you from the stenches everyone else deals with…"

Tali was already in Jack's room. Which smelled like paint.

"Look, Garrus let me start," Tali started nervously. Nervously even for her.

"No, Tali, I -" Garrus was terrified of what she might say. Vega had him thinking about some weird things that mutated awfully in his short trip. 

"I'm not interested!" She interrupted, loudly. Engineer Adams probably heard her.

All the discomfort James Vega filled him with started to melt. 

"Good," Garrus said. "But why. Why did you think…?" 

"You flirt with me. I know I flirt back. It's a coping mechanism and I'm not proud. But, I'm not going to be a side piece." Tali said firmly. 

"Side piece?" Garrus repeated, getting angry. "You of all people should know that I would never cheat on Shepard. Especially with you. No. Especially with anyone!"

 _This is what you get for being nice_ , Shepard would say. 

"Cheating? But aren't you two…" Tali started fidgeting again, and was gesturing about something he could not understand. 

Tali sighed. As if that would clear things up. "Aren't you two open?"

"No," Garrus said, the first thing he said that he fully understood since he heard about this Tali thing. 

"And I'm not flirting," he continued. "Flirting is…" no. That felt too personal. Flirting is being open and a little bit vulnerable, showing someone something they might like, hoping they might ask for more. 

"So what I do is. I'm just talking to my friends. And I know I can be a tease, but I thought it was obvious. I'm just trying… you know...guess I was wrong," he finished trying to mask his hurt feelings. Why was he so bad at talking?

"Oh, Garrus. I'm sorry. I thought especially with how Shepard is," Tali moved closer and kindly rubbed his arm. "When she's around some people..."

"I know," Garrus said tiredly. This was a waste of time and energy, neither of which was abundant. "You know how she is."

* * *

"How she is?" Shepard repeated. "How am I?"

"Flirty," Garrus answered, honestly. 

Shepard waited for him to continue.

"You can't talk to Vega without," Garrus made gestures, not sure how to say she broke a lot of harassment regulations. 

"But that doesn't mean anything," Shepard insisted. "It's just banter."

Garrus waited. 

"And at least it's not just James," she continued. "It's Miranda, Bailey, Aria… a few hours ago I propositioned Joker in the middle of Afterlife. I also hit on Tali..."

Just? Is a list (a list he had no intention of thinking about yet) better?

"Ah," Garrus realized something. "Do you want to… be… open?"

Shepard shook her head. "Nah, not right now. Am I a hypocrite? Do you want me to stop?"

Garrus shrugged and answered both questions. "Kind of." 

She could decide what his answer applied to. 

"I'll stop flirting around then. You're all I need for my fragile ego anymore anyway." She gave him a quick kiss. 

"So," she said cheerfully, "as we banter, the sexual tension is off the charts. You've never been so hot for anyone. Where have I been all your life? You must have me…"


	6. For You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fluffuary Day 6 - gifts

ME1

"Don't say I never did anything for you," Shepard said, annoyed that she agreed to this diversion. Why did she? Oh yeah. Because as a Spectre she could. And Vakarian made a pretty good argument. Nothing wrong with hunting down and killing a serial killer. 

"Commander, I wouldn't have gotten this far in life if I was that stupid," Garrus Vakarian politely replied. 

Shepard snorted, and mostly agreed. He wasn't stupid. However, as for the other item,

"I'm not sure you're experienced enough to say you've come very far at all."

In another mark for his intelligence, he knew when to shut up. 

"... not very far _yet_ ," she quietly finished. 

The MSV Fedele was full of those human-like things. Like on Eden Prime, on Feros, and seemingly everywhere. 

Shepard was sure this thing was a bust. No one was alive here. Just as she was going to tell Garrus to look for his serial killer Salarian doctor in the carnage, suddenly, there he was. A Salarian. Alive. 

"That's him," Garrus growled, interrupting the Salarian's thanks for saving his life, which quickly turned to protests - he wasn't who they were looking for, he was innocent, please…

"Are you sure, Garrus?" Shepard asked. 

He was. 

"Go for it," Shepard said. Garrus has been reliable so far. And even if he was wrong - well the Salarian was right. He wouldn't have survived if they didn't come for him. Either way, he would be dead by now. 

As Garrus looked at the body of the killer he had been chasing, Shepard felt his relief, a powerful feeling radiating past his cop armor. 

"Remember this feeling," she told him. If he was going to get far, he needed to know, "There's no problem you can't fix by shooting it in the head."

In yet another credit to his intelligence, he agreed. 

* * *

ME2

While hardware wasn't her thing, Garrus's visor got very little damage when he got shot in the face. Shepard knew enough to make it stop sparking. 

Find the problem, find where it's coming from, destroy the source. Just like everything. 

"I fixed it," she thought triumphantly, watching it turn on without sputtering pieces of electricity at her. 

Only for Jacob to tell her Garrus was dead.

"My visor now," Shepard decided, not sure what to do with the sadness and regret that came with her new toy. The doctors tried, but getting hit in the face with a rocket… wasn't that bad apparently. 

Garrus Vakarian himself interrupted his own death notice. Jacob, to his credit, took his correction with grace and left. Hopefully to check his sources. 

"I got you this," Shepard said, knowing she could get her own visor instead of using this one.

"My own visor, thanks," Garrus said dryly examining the damage. 

He was probably judging her work. All the things that she did wrong. It wasn't supposed to be perfect, it was supposed to not be a fire hazard.

"I did some _basic_ maintenance, for _you_."

"Thank you Shepard," he said, settling it back onto his face.

"Don't say I never fixed anything for you," she said, grumpily. 

"I would never." 

* * *

ME3

"Here," Shepard handed Garrus a package as he entered her cabin. 

"What are these?" Garrus asked, pulling out lube, clamps, more lube…

"Mods," Shepard answered simply. 

"Mods for you?" Garrus asked, examining a little shovel shaped thing was. She wasn't sure what it was either. 

"For us. An excellent weapon needs excellent accessories," she shrugged. 

Garrus began laying things out on the bed, like it was a workstation. "Turians generally call these things sex toys," he said, waving a ball gag at her, "not mods."

"Turians generally don't get me," Shepard retorted. 

"I'm pretty sure humans call them sex toys too."

"And since you get me, you get the best mods," Shepard pushed him onto the bed, straddling him, messing up his organization. Something started to whir. 

"Ah yes, the deluxe Shepard set."

"So don't say I never got anything for you," Shepard was proud of the collection she put together. He better appreciate it. 

Garrus pulled her down, flush against him. She felt him more than she heard him ask, "And what would you do if I did?"

Oh. She was not in a mindset to think. 

"I'll think of something," she promised, trying not to move with the vibrator he was - Where did he get that? Oh yeah. 

"Luckily," Garrus flipped her over, "we'll never find out." He kissed her. "Because" another kiss, "you've given me everything."

Before Shepard could roll her eyes or say something about how corny he was, the vibrator shot up to the maximum speed.


	7. Direction Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fluffuary Day 7 - holding hands   
> I failed on the fluff part. But if you see some, great!Tomorrow will be this Shepard's perspective.

ME2

Tarith was foggy. Practically opaque. 

One of the disadvantages of having so much in common was that Shepard rarely wanted another sniper. She already stayed back and hidden, leading her team from the shadows. There was no reason for Garrus to do the same. Especially since he learned how to do it from watching her. 

So why did she bring him on a mission so murky they would both be sniping blind? At least Jack was there - a walking bomb with instant detonation. 

Then, Shepard grabbed his hand. And held it. A slow sway as their hands cradled together between them. 

"Jack, there's probably Blood Pack here, somewhere. Go wander around and get rid of whoever you run into."

"Wait, hold on Shepard. Just kill whoever I see?" Jack confirmed, obviously waiting to get too excited. 

"Do I need to slow down?" Shepard said. A rhetorical question. "Yes... Jack. If you see someone here. They are… Blood Pack...kill them."

"And if I see you guys? Should I kill you too?" Jack frowned and pointed at their hands, still together. 

"You won't and you couldn't on your best day. We'll shut down the communication."

"Have fun," Jack and Shepard said at the same time as Jack disappeared in the clouds. 

Garrus would guess that Jack muttered "bitch" at the same time Shepard did too. 

"Jack needs to run around and wear herself out sometimes," Shepard explained. "Now we," she pointed at a beacon above them, "will need these for our job."

Garrus wasn't sure he liked the idea of Jack running into Blood Pack territory blind and alone, but he trusted Shepard not to get her squad killed. Or not killed over this. 

"And this?" Garrus gestured to their hands. He decided it would be more accurate to say she was gripping his main finger, her smallest and outermost finger gently touching his as they walked. 

"So we don't get lost."

"So you brought me for my sense of direction?"

"Exactly," Shepard said. "Let's go."

They were like one unwieldy person, whose right hand was Shepard's, the left his. It was awkward and weird and Garrus had no idea if he should pretend it wasn't. 

But, he had to admit his sense of direction was excellent. 

Once in a while, the deep  _ bwump _ of Jack's biotics, along with her screaming, let them know where she was. And that she was alive. 

They worked out a rhythm of activating the beacons one handedly. 

It was like lovers running errands on the Presidium, something he had seen plenty of. Holding hands, wandering around, stopping once in a while, bypassing klixen corpses. 

Shepard was quiet. 

Shepard was out of it. 

Shepard trusted him to lead her. She wasn't paying any attention.

He should say something. 

Or maybe not. This was surprisingly calm. 

As long as there was no reason to worry? She probably needed a break. 

Shepard let go of him when they met back up with Jack to finish the mission.

He should say something. 

"You didn't get lost," he said gently. 

Shepard frowned and laughed a dead laugh, "Shows what you know." 


	8. Direction Part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fluffuary Day 8 - long walk  
> Like day 7, this one is light on fluff. I don't think there is any. Oops.

Another Blood Pack mission. 

"What does this even have to do with the Collectors?"

Miranda didn't answer. Which was fine. Shepard didn't want an answer. 

There wasn't really a necessary reason to attack the Blood pack, they were a general hindrance to anything in the Terminus, and anything definitely included her mission. 

And her mission needed platinum, which this Blood Pack had. 

Shepard carefully touched her face, feeling the hard split scars. She didn't like them. And if Miranda noticed Shepard's unhappiness? Good. It's her fault she has the scars, and as soon as they got enough platinum, they'd be gone.

"Anything else, Shepard?" Miranda asked.

"Yes. I'm going to start sending Garrus to lead these errands."

Miranda said nothing.

"He's going to be my second when we go for the Collectors, he needs to warm up. "

"Your second? And what am I?"

"Come on Lawson. You're my right hand woman."

Miranda chuckled. Always hard to know what that meant. 

So, she'd take Garrus down, assess him, since it had been a while, and start giving him more to do.

EDI could cover calibrations.

Tarith was foggy. Fuck. She wished Cerberus put in a switch to help calm her down. 

But why would they? Bringing back Shepard just as she was would have brought back a woman who didn't have panic attacks because of clouds. 

The air was bad. She could barely see anything. Shepard grabbed Garrus. Like a baby. But it helped stabilize her. 

She could hand things to Garrus right now. But, Jack couldn't see her like this.

Remember platinum. 

She sent Jack to find the Blood Pack. She and Garrus would. Something the beacons. And platinum. 

Things would be better when she got her face back. 

"And this?" Garrus lifted their joined hands. 

_No, don't let go._ Shepard tightened her hold.

"So we don't get lost."

"So you brought me for my sense of direction?"

There was no way to tell him how many ways that was right. 

Garrus started to walk. 

Like a puppet, she followed. All she saw was the same fog. Like walking on a treadmill. Or in space. 

Foot, foot, foot. 

No, she wasn't completely untethered. Garrus walked like he had a map. No, Garrus walked like he could draw a map from memory of this place. 

Walk walk walk.

She held him tighter. It was hard to feel anything through their gloves. She could be holding his empty armor for all she knew.

"I WILL DESTROY YOU!!" based on volume, Jack wasn't that far.

"Well, at least we know Jack's still alive," Garrus said and held her hand just as tight. 

"Were you worried?" She teased, feeling some life, some surface to walk on. She made a note that when she came back to reality, that Garrus should have Jack on his teams. 

Wait. She already thought that. Which is why they were here. 

Walking, stopping, beacon. 

Again.

Platinum. 

Walking, stopping, beacon. 

Again. 

Maybe platinum. Maybe dead bodies that Garrus led her over like it was any other step. 

Again. 

Walking, stopping, beacon. 

Platinum. 

Jack. Krogan. 

Garrus pulled away. Shepard felt like she might be floating in the fog and not know.

"Are we done?" Jack asked. 

"Did we get all the platinum?" Shepard answered. 

"We did," Garrus said.

She wanted to grab him again. 

A tether. 

"You didn't get lost," he said gently. 

His observation skills were, as always, excellent. She had to frame this as an exercise. See how he was as a leader when his team was a dead weight.

He passed the test and got extra points for staying aware of his ground team's wellbeing. He would think this was just a test. 

"Shows what you know."

He'd find out. Garrus would be her second. 


	9. He called her that once

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fluffuary Day 9 - being silly
> 
> This is probably the last one of these. I may post a few more that are about done, but otherwise, thank you for coming on this journey with me.

Early ME3

Shepard cleared her throat. 

"Yes?" Garrus turned to see her looking. Light. Content. An odd look considering her home planet was on fire, but he felt the same. 

He had barely been back on the Normandy a day and everything was sliding into place. Whatever happens in this war, this is where he belongs. For all of it.

"This is a personal visit," Shepard said as she strolled into the main battery and looked for a place to sit. And then at him, expectantly. 

"Hold on," he said, settling his panel before grabbing her by the waist and sitting her on it. 

Shepard squeaked. Then blushed. He wouldn't tell anyone she made that noise. Although maybe he might need something in return. 

"I suppose this was inevitable," he said, as if he were resigned. He pushed her legs open and stepped in.

"Was it?" Shepard smirked and leaned back, and away from his hands, pushing them back to him. At least her legs were still open and she didn't mind him getting comfortable there. 

"Maybe it is, but I'm here to go over some things," she continued. 

He should get even more comfortable, he thought, pushing her thighs closer, so they were right around his waist. "Alright," he said, enjoying this.

She looked so soft, smiling at him. This was great. 

"Now that we'll be enjoying each other," she started to outline his neck with her fingers (very nice), "we need to set up some rules."

Oh. Oh no. 

Not that it didn't make sense. These arrangements could probably get confusing. 

"Of course," he agreed. That blackmail he was contemplating earlier should be against the rules. 

His omnitool buzzed. 

"That's the names you can call me, and the names you can't," she said. 

He gripped her thigh and held it close against him, to help him look at her list. 

"This all seems reasonable," he said. Was this the only rule? Maybe there should be more. Like about blackmail. 

"You're very thorough," he had no idea where she got these things. Human things, probably. Or something.

"You know it," she leaned forward again. And opened her mouth on his neck. Her breath was hot. Yes. Good. 

But, wait. 

"I can't call you any of these on the forbidden list?"

"You're literate, figure it out, " she mumbled as her teeth - 

Yes. Wait. No. He wouldn't be able to concentrate. He pulled back. 

"Wasn't this inevitable?" She frowned. 

"Oh, yes, it is." He wasn't losing this. He pushed himself between her thighs and she immediately started to grind on his groin. She liked this. He knew she would. But first,

"Can't I get one? I should be able to pick at least one forbidden name."

"No," Shepard scowled.

"I'm a very generous lover. I've earned one," he slowly teased her side, trailing slow little pinches between her ass and breasts. 

"What were you thinking?" She moved into his touches, smiling and squirming against him. The little hedonist. 

"Janine?" No, he did mean that one. 

"My name?" She asked. It was a stupid one to pick.

"Sorry, no, I don't pick that one." Not when Janey was on the sometimes list. And, as she said, easier to say. 

She rolled her eyes in approval. 

"Sex varren?" Why was this on the list?

"No."

"Maybe," he countered. She had to have considered it to reject it. 

"Do you really want 'sex varren?'" She frowned. Oh no, he was losing her. 

"Let's try it out," he husked into her ear, while he grabbed her very grabbable ass and pushed her closer. 

Just one little nipple pinch and she'd be rubbing herself to an orgasm. Even after six months, she was still predictable. 

"Uh huh," she agreed, probably not agreeing to anything in particular. 

He opened his teeth on her neck, and moved with her. Then right as she started to rise…"Come on my little sex varren."

"Ah, wha," she giggled as she came, an incomplete orgasm, and tried to look like she disapproved. 

'Just trying it out," he said innocently. 

"No, you get no names on the forbidden list."

"Ah well," he mused, as he loosened his pants and gestured for her to do the same. She made a mess on both of their clothes.

There was no more reason to delay the inevitable. "it was worth it." 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading and I hope you enjoyed ❤


End file.
